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How best to avoid a hiding with a team he clearly thinks isn’t up to the job

first_img Pinterest The Fiver FAR AND AWAYThe Fiver would give several pennies for the thoughts of José Mourinho as he sits in the suite he has called home for the past two-and-a-half years at the Lowry Hotel. With the thrill of frightening staff by dressing as a zombie using his shower curtain, snaffling complimentary biscuits and tungsten-tipped screws long gone and being able to take apart and reassemble his Corby Trouser Press quicker than a blindfolded soldier field-stripping an AK47 assault rifle, the Manchester United manager has plenty of time to dwell on the vicissitudes of life, not least how best to avoid a hiding against Liverpool at Anfield on Sunday with a team he clearly thinks isn’t up to the job.“Far,” was his abrupt answer, upon being asked on Friday how far Manchester United are away from being the team he wants to play in his image. Asked to elaborate, he could scarcely have been more co-operative: “Far,” he reiterated. He wasn’t done yet, though. Oh no, he’d come prepared with an analogy. Embarking on a lengthy monologue, José explained how football teams are like houses. “A house is not just about buying new furniture, you have to do work in the house and when the house is ready, then you buy the furniture, you spend money on the best possible furniture, and then you are ready to live in an amazing house,” he said, to widespread looks of confusion around the press room. Pinterest Twitter The possibly incorrect consensus seems to be that José was alluding to Liverpool’s massive spending during the summer, although he may just have spent too long in that hotel and be pining for an occasional table, chaise longue and mahogany wardrobe to call his own. Either way, we’re assuming it was a dig at his own chief suit Ed Woodward, who last summer refused to buy him the reinforced stainless steel back door and home alarm system he so craved and instead left him to put Phil Jones on sentry duty, only for the hapless defender to usher the intruders in, make them a pot of tea and then show them where all the valuables are kept.Meanwhile at Anfield, Jürgen Klopp has problems of his own and is kneeling on the carpet, screwdriver in hand and swearing loudly over assorted bits of a flatpack Nathaniel Clyne, now that Joe Gomez, Joël Matip and Trent Alexander-Arnold are all in the carpenter’s workshop in various states of disrepair. “Clyney was unfortunately injured in the last two weeks, nothing serious but serious enough that he couldn’t train,” said Klopp. “Luckily he has been back in full training for the last four days. Is he ready for 90 minutes? I don’t know.” With all available evidence of their performance against Valencia suggesting United will only play for 10, we think he should be OK.QUOTE OF THE DAY“At my first press conference I was told: ‘You know nothing about the players, nothing about women’s football’ and I just thought it was incredibly disrespectful” – Phil Neville gets his chat on with Sachin Nakrani and reflects on a year in charge of England Women and how he plans to lead them to World Cup glory.SUPPORT THE GUARDIANProducing the Guardian’s thoughtful, in-depth journalism [the stuff not normally found in this email, obviously – Fiver Ed] is expensive, but supporting us isn’t. If you value our journalism, please support us. In return we can hopefully arm you with the kind of knowledge that makes you sound slightly less uninformed during those hot reactive gegenpress chats you so enjoy. And if you think what we do is enjoyable [again, etc and so on – Fiver Ed], please help us keep coming back here to give you more of the same.FIVER LETTERS“It’s probably worth bearing in mind that Mike Ashley’s idea of a cash injection (yesterday’s Bits and Bobs) might just have been sending the first team around to help out with a bit of shelf-stacking on the cup nights where Newcastle United are unavoidably not otherwise detained” – Andy Turner.“Yes, Sam Allardyce calling out Theresa May is all very well, but what would he know about underwhelming, saying one thing to one group, another thing to another group of people and then being forced out of his dream job too early?” – Noble Francis.Send your letters to [email protected] And you can always tweet The Fiver via @guardian_sport. Today’s winner of our letter o’the day is … Noble Francis, who snaffles a copy of Richard Foster’s new book, From an Acute Angle.NEWS, BITS AND BOBSAston Villa have suspended long-serving youth coach Kevin MacDonald from working with players, after a former graduate of the club, Gareth Farrelly, detailed claims of relentless bullying from MacDonald in the mid-1990s to David Conn. Facebook Topics Share on Pinterest Read more Share via Email Share on Facebook Ten! Composite: Getty Images, Rex/Shutterstock, Action Images How will the 16 teams in the Big Cup knockout stages fare? Ben McAleer and Josh Wright make their predictions.Raheem Sterling’s racism ordeal was ugly but the reaction has been positive, writes Eni Aluko.Remember Liverpool 4-4 Manchester United in 1953? Nope? Well, let Scott Murray remind you in this archive Joy of Six on the great rivalry.Oh, and if it’s your thing … you can follow Big Website on Big Social FaceSpace. And INSTACHAT, TOO!OH HELL YEAHcenter_img Gareth Farrelly. Photograph: Alicia Canter/The Guardian Share on LinkedIn Share on WhatsApp features Reuse this content Share on Twitter Facebook Chelsea face a partial stadium closure if Uefa finds their fans guilty of antisemitic chanting in the match against Vidi in Hungary.Expert in anger Neil Warnock reckons some people get too wound up when they watch football. “These people are so vitriolic,” honked the Cardiff boss. “Some people go to games just for aggro, and that’s been the case forever.”Uefa has given Milan a slap on the wrists and told them they must avoid FFP-knack and break even by 2021 or they’ll be turfed out of European competition as they were on Thursday night, following a 3-1 Big Vase defeat by Olympiakos.Gary Lineker has been criticised by his BBC colleague, former whites-wearing, willow-wielding cricketer Jonathan Agnew, for expressing his political views on social media disgrace Twitter. “I’ll continue to tweet what I like and if folk disagree with me then so be it,” roared Lineker.Bristol Rovers’ search for a new manager continues after introducing Darrell Clarke to the Memorial Stadium’s Do One exit, with Newport’s Mike Flynn linked with the gig. “I was 8-1 on at Shrewsbury and didn’t get the job,” he sighed. “It’s just paper talk again and it means nothing.”And AIK mega-fan Stefan Jonasson had better hope that he’s in good health after forking out £17,070 on an “eternity card”, which gives the 43-year-old access to every home match for the rest of his life. “I have no kids of my own, so in that way AIK has become kind of a substitute,” he cheered.STILL WANT MORE?Our blog on 10 things to look out for in the Premier League this weekend is really getting into the Christmas spirit with talk of supercharged Saints and putting the focus on Jesus. Twitter José Mourinho: Manchester United are far from playing in my image Share on Messenger Footballlast_img read more

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‘Liverpool should get Eriksen & Alli’

first_imgTransfers ‘Liverpool should get Eriksen & Alli’ – Collymore calls for summer spending spree Chris Burton 01:28 5/28/18 FacebookTwitterRedditcopy Comments(5) Jurgen Klopp in Kiev Getty Transfers Liverpool Tottenham Hotspur Premier League The former Reds striker wants Fenway Sports Group to back Jurgen Klopp with considerable funds and mount a Premier League title challenge Liverpool should be looking to sign the likes of Christian Eriksen and Dele Alli this summer, says Stan Collymore, with Fenway Sports Group called upon to back an elaborate spending spree by Jurgen Klopp.The Reds did break their transfer record when landing £75 million ($100m) man Virgil van Dijk in January, while Naby Keita is set to arrive in a £52m ($69m) deal, but there are funds available from the sale of Philippe Coutinho to Barcelona and a run through to the Champions League final.Collymore wants to see those invested back into the squad, with it vital that the Anfield board display some ambition in the next window if the gap is to be closed on Manchester City in the Premier League and progress maintained in Europe. Article continues below Editors’ Picks Goalkeeper crisis! Walker to the rescue but City sweating on Ederson injury ahead of Liverpool clash Out of his depth! Emery on borrowed time after another abysmal Arsenal display Diving, tactical fouls & the emerging war of words between Guardiola & Klopp Sorry, Cristiano! Pjanic is Juventus’ most important player right now The former Reds striker wrote in a column for the Daily Mirror: “The pressure is on the Fenway Sports Group – and now they have to deliver for Jurgen Klopp.“Liverpool’s owners need to use the Champions League Final as a platform to build a squad that is capable of standing squarely toe-to-toe with those being ­assembled in Manchester.“The first XI put together by the ­affable German has shown that, on its day, it can compete with the very best.“It has dismantled ­defences across Europe. It has shredded a lot of reputations in the ­Premier League as goals have rained down.“But, for all of their promise in the second half of this season, Liverpool do not have the strength in depth of their two great rivals.”Collymore added: “If the Reds are to close the gap, they need genuine A-listers as back-up. And I believe now is the time to strike.Liverpool should sign Christian Eriksen Dele Alli Stan Collymore“By reaching two European finals in three seasons, Klopp has shown he can manage.“And now FSG have to demonstrate their commitment too by using the £75m-plus generated by this run and back their man in the transfer market.“I am not talking about signing the likes of Andy Robertson – as good as he has been.“I am talking about wandering into White Hart Lane, plonking £150m on the table in front of Daniel Levy and saying: ‘I’ll give you that for Christian Eriksen, Toby Alderweireld and Dele Alli.’“I would still like the owners to give the green light for three or four marquee signings.”Liverpool are being linked with several high-profile signings, with it possible that additions could be made across the board.A disastrous showing by Loris Karius in a 3-1 Champions League final defeat to Real Madrid has reignited calls for a new goalkeeper to be found, while defensive issues remain and greater options are required in the final third to support the ‘Fab Three’ of Mohamed Salah, Sadio Mane and Roberto Firmino. Subscribe to Goal’s Liverpool Correspondent Neil Jones’ weekly email bringing you the best Liverpool FC writing from around the weblast_img read more

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